Wednesday, 16 February 2011

Intervals - time machine

I've now got a few weeks worth of miles under my belt, so today I did some intervals. Me and another bloke where I work went out at lunchtime and did six lots of fast running for 2 minutes, separated by jogging for another 2 minutes.

Einstein's theory of relativity states that objects going close to the speed of light experience time differently to those that are not. I'm not an expert on relativity or travelling quickly, but time was certainly altered today.

Every time we started running the fast bits, the 2 minutes seemed to take ages. Whereas when we were running a lot more slowly, each 2 minutes was up before we'd even started to get our breath back.

On returning to work, I sent an email to the journal Science, so that others could benefit from my groundbreaking discovery. I'm hopeful that time travel can be developed based around the same concept.

For the rest of the afternoon, I had a lot to do, so stayed in my running kit and ran round the office, trying to slow my time so that I would have more time to complete the report I was working on. Unfortunately, I had to nip back to the computer every few minutes to type another word.

By home time, imagine my surprise when I realised I'd only done about 20 words. I was also very tired. I can only conclude that the time machine effect doesn't work inside buildings. I will let Science know about this first thing in the morning. Actually, it will have to be at 10am tomorrow, as I notice I've got a meeting with my boss and the head of HR first thing. Perhaps they're interested in getting more people to try my experiment, or maybe moving me to an outside office.

Albert Einstein relaxing after a hard set of 12x400m


  1. I'm very impressed, Noel. You have a highly developed mind. Further to your Science submissions, your boss and head of Human Remains will give you a nice big promotion and pay rise when they see the effect of that mind on the 20 words you typed. The report will transform the company's fortunes. You might need a new suit for the move into the boardroom. Big bold pinstripes are bound to impress. Get a size up to leave enough room for the running kit underneath and they will never know your guilty secret.

  2. Thanks Nick. I'll order the suit right now. What can go wrong?

  3. If you need any additional data points I have noticed the same results on the monday evening fatboy club run. In the hour or so we spend running around the peak in the dark, time goes significantly more slowly than it does at the bar of the scotsmans once we have finished. In fact I would like to postulate an additional effect:- that the speed up in time is directly proportional to the number of pints consumed post training run.

    Possibly downing a couple of pints before your lunchtime intervals would balance out the slowdown effects you are seeing?

  4. Excellent idea Dave. I'm more than happy to put that one to the test. This is probably how that guy out of Back to the Future started.

    Great Scott Marty!